Well, after I had been in the room about ten minutes, talking to huge overdressed  dwagers and tedious Academicians, I suddenly became conscious that someone was looking at me. I turned halfway round, and saw him for the first time. When our eyes met, I felt that I was growing pale. A curious sensation of terror came over me. I knew that I had come face to face with someone whose mere personality was so fascinating that, if I allowed it to do so, it would absorb my whole nature, my whole soul, my every art itself. I did not want any external influence in my life. You know yourself, how independent I am by nature. I have always been my own master; had at least always been so, till I met him.Then... something seemed to tell me that I was on the verge of a terrible crisis in my life. I had  a strange feeling that Fate had in store for me exquisite joys and exquisite sorrows. I grew afraid, and turned to quit the room. It was not conscience that made me do so; It was a sort of cowardice. I take no credit to myself for trying to escape

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